Wednesday, 4 May 2016

Lady Gaga’s® Crazy Fish Tank Emporiums are now open!

Yes, Lady Gaga is proud to announce that her new ‘Crazy Fish Tank Emporiums’ are open for business.

Gaga’s® offers:

*The world’s zaniest Fish Tank experience*

*Kids love it*

*Gaga’s® specialises in parties*

No fuss; just Fish Tanks – “Is there anything else? No, just Fish Tanks!

“Is that fish in military tanks?” No you Tosser, it’s just fish swimming around in Fish Tanks.

               The Lady Gaga Fish welcomes all our guests personally.

New for 2016:

Why buy an expensive fish tank, when you can hire one for half the price? Gaga’s® hire service is open 24 hours a day, and our fish tanks can be hired for as little as two minutes or as long as two hundred years!

Our tinted black windows are great for ugly fish, and our bullet-proof glass can withstand up to fifty bullets.

What’s that you say, do we have Nostalgic Fish Tanks? 

Yes, fish tanks that remind you of a gentler age, including Victorian wooden fish tanks a speciality. (Warning: Our Victorian wooden fish tanks are non-transparent!) 

How do we do it? Gaga’s crazy that’s how! 

Would you like a fish tank for a dollar? What about three and half fish tanks for $5? Or, what about eight fish tanks for 5 cents? 

How do we stay in business? 

Don’t you worry about that, Lady Gaga will worry about that coz that’s her lookout!

                                     Lady Gaga’s® Executive Fish Tanks.

So, why not come around and ask for me, Mental Rob Gotobed! Or for one of my assistants, Mental Donald Trump or Mental Paris Hilton? We’re all mental, and we’re ready to serve you!!

Public Notice: Last week’s ‘Lucky Number’ was Fish Tank Number 78!

“The world of fish tanks is now a lot safer than it was when I first became President. Advances in fish tank technology by Lady Gaga has revolutionised the industry.” Barack Obama, The Whitehouse, May 2016.

          All Tropical Fish locally sourced by Rob Gotobed himself.

Please note: All Gaga’s® staff are guaranteed to sexually harass you!